Wake Up Call

I have not been on as I'm sure you've noticed and apologize, even though I know I don't need to with all you wonderful loving, understanding friends. I guess you could say I went through a pity party. Yes, I know, pathetic. I recieved a wake up call Tuesday telling me that my cholesterol is high and had to go on medication for it. At first I thought, okay. The Good Lord is telling me it's time to wake up and smell the roses, you need to take better care of yourself. Then thoughts set in. My grandfather had died from hardening of the arteries, a massive heart attack, and Alzhiemers. My dad has already had stints put in and has high blood pressure, cholesterol and diabetic. His mom and dad were both diabetics, with an aunt that was very diabetic. My mom's mom suffered from strokes, and I'm sure she has had them as well but won't get tested.

So I "dwelled" on all this and became angry with myself for letting myself get like this, thinking I would be the odds and ignoring all the "early" warning signs. Then thought about my family and what it's doing to them. Then came the "poor me" garbage. Oh no, now I can't eat this and that. I can't enjoy the foods I'm used to. After 48 years of bad eating habits, it's going to be hard to change. Wah wah wah.

Then I thought, what am I doing. How pathetic is this. This is my chance to do what I've battled to do over and over and over again for years. This is my chance to do things the healthy way and "stay" there!!! I went and had my hair cut. (Jay had given me a gift certificat for mother's day) and decided to pamper myself for a change. I usually cut my own hair. Then off to barns and noble and bought a couple of cookbooks. One being the American Heart Associations "Low Fat, Low Cholesterol cookbook," and the other "Sensational Salads." When I browsed through these books, I realized that many of the favorites were in there, just prepared in a much healthier manner.

Now I realize that over all, I've been cooking healthy for the most part. It's all the other "stuff" I was doing. Sweets, oh yeah, gotta have that CHOCOLATE! :{ Fast food, hard to avoid for some stupid reason. Thurs. when going to get the books, we passed these different places and it was like saying good bye to some good friends. (Shaking head in disgust with myself). Now, I'm excited!!! I can let go of the bad habits and bring in the good!

But anyhoo, I became depressed and didn't really want to do anything, but one good thing came out of it. I finally got back to listening to pod casts and getting in the Word. Forgive me Father for being such a whimp! Thank You for lifting me back up. Thank You for giving me a second chance! May this story give others hope if they are experiencing weight problems and/or poor eating habits. Amen!

Oh yeah, still no MRI. I'm going to give my doctor a call on Monday and ask to see a Neurologist first, as the feet are getting worse, and he/she can deal with the possible strokes (TIA's) as well. While looking this stuff up, I have had all the symptoms. God is good! He could have had me go through a full blown stroke; but instead gave me warning signs. Thank You Lord!!!