Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Losing the Young

I just finished reading a post from a fellow blogger. The person wrote of losing a fellow collegue and friend of age 23. The person was hit and killed while riding a bike.

It's times like this when you look for the right words to say. Losing anyone is hard no matter what, but for some reason it seems harder when the person is young or a child. I've seen many lost at such young ages. Recently lost a sister-in-law at age 50. The hardest of all was a 16 year old girl that was so full of life and promise. Another was a very dear friend losing her first child to SIDS. The baby wasn't that old. Losing the baby really took it's toll on mom. Another was the loss of a friend in her 30's. Her husband found her. They were such a great couple. One other was losing a sister that would have been close in age to me. She was born 2 years after I was. I never got to meet her. She died just hours after being born on Feb. 14 1962. Her name is Kimberly. What helps me with this is knowing that someday I will finally meet my sister!

It hits hard in the pit of the stomach when you hear of such things. You ask all kinds of questions. The hardest for me is knowing what to say. You want to be strong and supportive, while the whole time your heart is breaking for them. What really helps me, especially with kids is the thought that God must have some really special need for that child. Granted, He already has our times picked out, but it just feels comforting to think that thought. But that still doesn't take away the pain of loss from the family members and friends.

The best thing is prayer. There is nothing more powerful than prayer. One piece of advice I'll never forget is that when a person loses a loved one, many are there for support the first couple of weeks, and then the emptiness hits. The time people need support the most is when the calls and visits stop coming. That time after is when the person(s) is really going to feel the loss of their loved one. I keep reminding my husband to stay in touch with his brother, as now is when he needs people more than ever. Those first two weeks, they are feeling the pain, but there seems to be plenty of people to keep you occupied so you don't dwell on it. But think about it, after that, it hits home. The shock wears off, the door bell and the phone quits constantly ringing...

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